One of the things I have struggled with most being here has been making friends. The close friends who you can cry to, who will accept your drunken ramblings and laugh about them later, the friends who you share with, good, bad, inbetween and everything else, those ones. I have met lots of lovely people who are wonderful but it is the leap between acquaintance and friendship which I’m finding really tough right now.
J is a great support, the move has made us closer but sometimes I don’t want to moan to him, or sometimes he’s not quite the right ear for what I want to say, I need a sounding board, someone who is different, gives me different perspectives. I also need female company and women to talk to.
I feel like as a child becoming friends was easier, you naturally met more people, were possibly less set in your ways and you would just ask ‘can I be your friend’. Whereas as an adult I feel like I have been dating friends, to see if they like me and if I like them. There seem to be more mines to avoid, more veneers to crack*.
I think the biggest leap is who to phone. Emailing is fine, meeting for a drink is lovely, a quick text not a problem but having a shit day at work and wanting to tell someone, that I haven’t got (yet, hopefully). So how do I do it?
Probably, I should just take the plunge and call someone. Dive right in and see what happens. So we’ll see, hopefully time will have its part to play in this whole merry-go-round.
*I feel like Americans tend to put on more of a veneer than Brits. They’re friendly, welcoming, sweet and kind, but then beneath that, who knows. I feel like it’s been a hard job cracking through those veneers. But then this is probably a whole other post.